Sausages and Ice-Cream
by Crazychicke
Summary: Jenny and Nate babysit Dan and Blair's kids for the night so they can go see a stage-play. Jenny and Nate are challenged by persistant questions, nappy changing and toilet-training, which proves to test their relationship. NJ. Dair. AU.


**Disclaimer: Gossip Girl is not owned by me, unfortunately. A/N: AU. Prompt: NJ babysitting.**

**Sausages and Ice-cream**

"Are you _sure_ you're going to be fine? I mean we could hold off another night, and actually get a babysitter to do this, but, well, it's our anniversary, and Blair's been waiting to see _Chitty Chitty Bang Bang_ for months, and she'd probably kill me if I postpone it ag-"

Jenny cut him off. "Dan, it's fine. How many times do I need to say it? Nate and I will take care of everything. Go!" Jenny elbowed Nate, as she jiggled her three year old nephew, Oliver on her knee.

"Yeah, man. I love kids," Nate said, looking up, rather awkwardly, with eight month old, Zoe, pointing up at the ceiling.

Dan gave him a suspicious look that gave the impression that he didn't believe him.

There were cases that spoke volumes of Nate's interactions with babies and children under the age of five. Still, he didn't have time to argue. He picked up his jacket.

"Ok, just call if there's any emergencies. I'll have my phone on- Blair! We're going to miss the train!"

Her response came from beneath the bathroom door. "I told you to book a limo!"

"And I told you, the train will get us there faster! The traffic is always horrendous on this side of the bridge." Dan checked he had the right tickets and wrapped a scarf around his neck, checking his watch.

"Well, you were the one who wanted to live in Brooklyn!" She left the bathroom, pulling a red velvet coat over her dress. "We'll try not to be too late. Be good." She leaned over the couch, brushing Oliver's hair aside and kissing his enthusiastic face.

"Aunty Jenny said we can have two helpings of ice-cream if we're good!" Oliver piped up.

"Did she now?" Blair laughed. "I've got the ideas on kitchen bench, Jenny. if you have time to draw up some designs that would be great, but don't feel obliged, we don't need them finalised until Monday week."

Jenny nodded, letting Oliver climb off her and he started making chugging noises like a train.

"Sure, I'll take a look. Now go!" Jenny said, waving them out. Blair blew kisses to Zoe, and hurried outside. The door closed behind them and Jenny sighed in relief. "I thought they'd never leave." Nate smiled as Zoe had a conversation with lots of da-das.

"She likes me," Nate grinned.

"You're doing well," Jenny stood up to go into the kitchen, and check dinner. Oliver jogged over to help, requesting his bowl of chocolate ice-cream. "You haven't had dinner yet!" she laughed.

"Mum said, I don't need sausages, just desert," Oliver said.

"Oh really?"

"Yes, because sausages are slimy. And I _detest _peas."

"All the more for me then!" Nate shouted.

Jenny checked the grill, making sure the gas was still alight and turned the sausages around. She heard Nate murmuring baby-talk in response to a giggle. She clapped the tongs, and wriggled her hips, entertaining Oliver, and laughing when he mimicked her.

"Nate, come in here! We need to heat up Zoe's milk, and you're missing out on some fabulous dancing, over there."

"Oh yeah? Well, you two are missing out over here." Nate stood, bopping along to his own music.

They exchanged smiles, and Jenny pictured dancing with her own kids. Oliver laughed for a while, then continued to campaign for desert over sausages and peas, but Jenny was a Humphrey and she had learnt to eat all her vegies, especially carrots, because they allowed her to see in the dark!

The microwave dinged, and Jenny dipped her little finger into the milk. "Just give it a minute to cool. I'm glad we're having sausages because I don't cook fancy stuff."

"Well, I think the sausages are burning," Nate said.

Jenny raced to the grill. "I just checked on them-!"

"Dad says Mum can't cook either. She orders takeitaway," Oliver said, seriously.

"I think you mean, takeaway, but we can salvage this. Do you want to help me mash the potatoes?" Jenny asked.

After successfully getting dinner on the table, and persisting with Oliver's constant questions, Jenny was almost ready for bed, but it was only 6.30pm! She couldn't help but wonder how Blair and Dan, managed to share the load, especially with both their careers, and no Dorota.

"Wonder if the play's started yet," Nate said, when Zoe burped some of her milk onto his collar.

"You know, this is their first night out for ages. We're doing great," Jenny said, convincing herself.

Oliver eventually got his desert, with an extra helping of chocolate sauce, and gummy bears. Even with a mouthful of desert, he was speaking sentences. Jenny turned to Nate, amused, until his look of disgust, prompted her to change Zoe's nappy and any thoughts of wanting kids.

"Can you help, Uncle Nate, wash up the dishes when you've finished, Oliver?"

"Mmm-hm," he said, right before swallowing.

Jenny carried a jubilant Zoe into the nursery, and pulled out a fresh nappy. She had changed her nappies before, and compared to Oliver's toilet training it was a cinch. She heard something crash to the floor, and hurried out, but Nate was already clearing away the broken glass.

"Don't go in there, Oliver, there might still be glass. Come and show me which movie you want to watch." She guided him out of the kitchen and he put his bowl back on the table, then sifted through the DVDs, explaining the story of each one. Judging by the movies, Dan was the one who went DVD shopping. _Finding Nemo_, it is.

"Oh, Nate! Can you bring Blair's folder over here, I just sat down, with Zoe."

"Sure, I think I got all the glass, but I'll vacuum it up anyway, there's all sorts of goo on the floor."

"It's in the linen cupboard, down the bottom."

"Ok, you might want to turn the volume up."

After Nate had vacuumed, he collapsed onto the couch beside her, and let Zoe gum on his finger.

"It's past your bed time."

"She's watching the movie."

"She'll be crabby if she doesn't get her beauty sleep, like someone else I know."

"Haha, well, we already decided, she's watching the start."

"The start is the saddest part."

"Since when have you seen this?"

"Who hasn't seen this movie?"

They had reached the scene where Nemo was about to go to school, when Oliver complained of needing the toilet, his hand, automatically clutching his pants.

"Your turn," Jenny said, before Nate could protest. She paused the movie, and entertained Zoe in the meantime.

"Hold it in, man." Nate said, and he picked him up and raced into the bathroom.

When the crisis had been diverted, and the toilet had been flushed twice, and Oliver finally remembered he needed to wash his hands, she pressed play.

Somewhere between the surfing turtles and Dory's "Just keep swimming", Jenny realised she probably should put Zoe into her cot, now that she had actually dozed off on her shoulder.

When she came back, she watched the end of the movie, and wondered whether Oliver would go to bed easily afterwards. Nate dropped his arm around her, and she snuggled beside him, her eye-lids drooping...

"Don't wake Aunty Jenny, you have to tip-toe off to bed, and whisper."

"Can you read me a story?" Oliver said, in his normal tone of voice.

"You just got a movie, that's the same thing."

"No it's not! A movie is something you watch, and a book is something you read."

"You got me, smarty-pants. I'll read you one, if it's short."

Jenny smiled, gratefully for a bit of shut-eye, although she didn't turn off her ears, and listened to Nate sit down on the mattress, and read Oliver a story. It was about a six year old boy, named Calvin and his stuffed tiger, Hobbes. _Bill Watterson._ One of Dan's favourites: _Calvin and Hobbes._

As Jenny chuckled, to the jokes, and to Nate's "reading" voice. She opened Blair's folder, intending to do some work. She had finished one sketch, when Nate finally came back.

"Did he go to bed ok?"

"I think so, he didn't want to, but he looks exhausted. So, do you want to watch a movie?"

"I've got these to finish."

"Do them tomorrow." Nate turned on the tv, and channel surfed until he found something worth watching. Jenny realised it wasn't even 9pm yet.

"Did Oliver clean his teeth before bed?" Jenny asked, suddenly. Nate made an apologetic face.

"Oh, well, at least Blair bathed him before we arrived, and he did eat his peas."

"That's all we could have hoped for, and a bit of peace and quiet." Nate leaned in to kiss her cheek. Jenny rolled her eyes, now there was no way she could concentrate, not when he had other things on his mind.

"My tummy hurts!" Oliver was standing in the hall. Nate pulled apart so fast, like it was illegal to kiss in front of toddlers. "Can you rub it?" Oliver pulled up his shirt, to show a sticky-outy belly-button.

"Well, that's what's wrong," Nate said. Jenny punched him in the arm for discriminating. She beckoned Oliver to her, and rubbed his stomach, hoping he wasn't sick.

It turned out to be a false alarm, and only gas, which burst from his small frame, so suddenly, that Jenny laughed and Nate dived over the couch to avoid the smell. She wondered how in the world Zoe could sleep through all the noise.

After reading another story, and brushing Oliver's hair out of his eyes, she returned to the couch, and snuggled up beside an already napping Nate. It was the first time in a week, she could just sleep soundly, without worrying about deadlines.

"You have to admit, they can be cute."

"We're not having kids, Jenny."

"Just one, at least?"

"No." Jenny pouted, until he opened his eyes. "Someday, but not today."

An hour later and both of them had dozed off during _Kindergarten Cop_, and Arnie's voice was reverberating inside her head, whilst Oliver smuggled a horse into the apartment and Zoe crawled up the walls and started to fly...

She vaguely heard the door open as Dan and Blair entered. She was too tired to acknowledge them, and Nate's chest was a particularly warm pillow, besides there was nothing waiting for them at home, and perhaps there would be waffles for breakfast.

"They're asleep," Dan smirked. The door to Oliver's bedroom creaked, and she heard him making sure everything was ok, before he called Blair, to hurry up. Jenny heard, what sounded like a camera phone, and she hoped, it was only her imagination.

"I'm coming..." Blair said, and Jenny would rather have been asleep than hear the names she was calling her brother. The door shut, and Nate kissed her forehead.

"Night, 'snookums'," he chuckled. He winced when she pinched him out of disgust. "I look forwards to waffles and ice-cream for breakfast."

"Only if you behave," Jenny whispered, and she closed her eyes again.

**A/N: Please review.**


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